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This is why I am so annoying/
My dad left when my brother was 3 weeks old leaving my mum to pay for 4 kids on her own. I never knew that he'd left because I was 1 at the time so I didn't notice anything different.
Mum had to fend by her self for 1 ½ years till she meet my now ex- step dad and had my little sister. And life was good then we moved into a new house and we just got on with our lies lives. We moved into another house when I was 6 and everything went ok, I had everything I needed, my mum hired au-pairs for us and she joined the police.
Then I noticed how messed up my family was.
My aunt moved into my street and I thought it was good but my mum told me to never walk past her house and if I needed to go anywhere that meant going beyond the street I had to use the alley half way down it. I was young I just accepted it. One night I couldn’t sleep so I listened to the silence, then my sister ran into the house screaming "MUM CHRIS JUST THREATENED TO RAPE ME" and I knew that she was serious about it. After that everything got worse. We had to get a restraining order out against my cousin because he kept driving down the street the wrong way and turning out side our house just to see if we were in. then the violence. First he smashed our door so It dragged when we opened it, then he smashed my sister. She was outside and he hit her with a baseball bat. It would have been murder if my au-pair hadn't saved her.
Then another sleepless night I heard my step dad screaming at mum and I could hear her shouting back and I then my sister calling the police saying her step dad had a GUN to his head and was saying he was going to pull the trigger. I just cried. The next morning when my brother said that he'd saw Jamie holding a gun to his head mum said it was a dream.
Then I started secondary school. 2 weeks later my cousin died of an ecstasy over dose. 4 tablets. And that’s when Chris decided to strike again. While sleeping in bed ½ a breeze block (a giant cement brick) came through the window landing less than a metre from my head.
After I had some counselling life was ok. I was on my own most of the time, and in French the girls on either side of me kept asking me to swap seats so they could sit together. You know the girls as well.
Then my life calmed down. It was basically just getting through exams and trying to be popular and getting guys to like me. Then in summer 2006 I had a dream come true. I got a boyfriend. Danny. We only lasted a week and after that, while on the rebound I meet Tom. He was really nice to me and when he went on holiday he waited 2 hours outside my house till I came home. The point our relationship went bad was when he decided that the best way to make me like him more was to put his hand down my underwear. I broke up with him then.
That Christmas I got my I pod and for a laugh I downloaded some song my little sister had been listening to called, Helena, I'm not okay and welcome to the black parade. I totally ignored them till I put my I-pod on shuffle and decided to listen to them. They affected me. The words seemed to get to me. From then on I gradually listened to them more and the other music on my I-pod less. Soon I found myself on a website called buzznet because my friend wanted to hear what our loose friends story was about and I did and when I read it I realised that I didn't belong to the crowd I was in so I went to the hairdressers and asked for my long hair to be cut to shoulder length.
And now you have me here in front of you. | 
