August 31, 2007I'm not o-fucking-kay chapter 5Ok I’m sick. YES BECCA I AM ACTUALLY SICK!!!!!!! I’M NOT FAKING!!!!!!!!! MY MUM MADE ME STAY HOME!!!!..............what was I saying oh yeah I’m sick and I decided to write a chapter or two of I’m not o-fucking-Kay. Oh and thanks go to Bethan (mcrmygal) for helping with this chapter because I had writers block. Oh and she’s writing the second next chapter cause I wrote a chapter of hers. “I totally understand if you run when I say this but this is a list of health problem I’ve had. My doctor told me to make a list” I said handing him a piece of paper from my bedside table. His eyes scanned down it. “How many are here?” He said lifting his head. His face was drained of colour; his eyes had lost their twinkle. “46 by last count, but if you saw its just migraines and repeat colds and sore throat” I said trying to look on the bright side. “And anorexia and bulimia and….what the fuck is that one??” he pointed to a name on the list. “Dyspraxia, its quite common condition like 1 in 12 I think….. I just happen to be the only person in school with it.” “What does it mean?” “It means I can’t run, write, my words get mixed up and I drool in my sleep if I leave my mouth open.” I said trying to giggle at the last part. “Ok it’s not cool and I hate it, you know the way on cold days and your fingers are uber numb and freezing and they don’t work like you want….well that’s everyday.” I just lay back down waiting for him to storm out in horror. After another 5 minutes he hadn’t spoke or left… or don’t anything but breathe. It started to annoy me. “Storm just leave I know you don’t want to be with a girl who is a dictionary for doctors.” “I don’t care about these I’m in shock because I can’t believe such an innocent, caring girl who puts everyone before her could have this stuff.” I told me putting the page down and lying next to me snuggling in as close as he could with out it feeling weird. I moved my hands so one was on my stomach and the other was in Storms hair. We just lay there in silence for ages. I know I was going to have to get up soon, but I just loved the feeling I was having at the moment. I loved Storms scent. I loved the way he knew exactly what to say. I love him. Shit I only meet him a few hours ago and now I’m in love with him. “Bell, Answer me 1 question. Do you have and of those conditions that are life long? Just if you’re unwell and it can be helped I want to help.” “No none of them is still around. I still have to take pills for an operation I had to get gunk taking out of my body.” He just nodded in agreement. “IS that all you can do, NOD!!?” I half shouted laughing. He just smiled “OK YOU ARE IN NEED OF SOME “OWWWW…. Truce...TRUCE. I’M INJURIED!!” Storm dropped his pillow and knelt beside me. *The next day at school* I practically skipped down the corridor. All the cheerleaders were giving me weird looks but screw them I’m happy. Before Storm left we arranged to meet up at lunch. He’s a freaking senior in the same school as me, lives round the corner from me and is REALLY pretty. Seriously I was excepting him to be secretly 30 and lives in the next state. But he is a senior I checked. Ok I asked one of the senior girls to quote her answer “Strom? As in Rendell Wens? How do you know him? He’s the quietest guy in senior. No junior knows him.” I just told her I was going out with him and walked away. Quiet? He wasn’t quiet yesterday that’s for sure. Right now I’m sitting in French doodling on my notebook. Ring damn you ring. I really want to get out of class NOW!! “ “Umm…no sorry…” Finally the bell rung just as she was about to dish out a punishment. I grabbed my bag shoving my books in as I sprinted out the door. I power walked down to the pond where I arranged to meet Storm. After 5 minutes he hadn’t showed. I knew it he was jus joking me around. As I grabbed my backpack off the grass I felt someone grab my waist. “Leaving so soon? I’ve only just arrived!” Turned to see Storm doing sad puppy eyes and pouting. “Well you are late.” “I was getting something from my locker.” He explained handing me a box. I opened it and inside was an envelope. There was a congratulations card inside, inside read: To Congratulations on stealing my heart. You can keep it forever on the condition you never break it. You made me believe in love at first sight I know it’s early but I love you. I was going to say all my heart but you have it so all the love I can give Storm xxxxxxxxx I nearly cried when i read it. he is so sweet and caring and beautiful and mine. God I can't believe this. “Ok hand it over.” “What?” “The book that you’re using to make me fall in love with you. It could abolish female independence.” “Sorry no book, just my knowledge” He said kissing my forehead. “Well In that case I can only say that I love you too and I don’t care how early it is. We sat on the grass and eat our lunches and talked about how Storm was graduating at the end of next month. Knowing my luck he will have forgot who I am by next month. We cuddled into each other for a while until the bell rang. I couldn’t bear to leave his arms but we both needed to get to class or else neither of us would be graduating.
Posted on 08/31/2007 11:56 AM Comments (1)
August 29, 2007random fight about whos hotter frank or gerard(oviusly gerard) between me and Bethanyou can guess whoes who I LOOK LIKE A GUY--> says: you like frank right[] [] [] [] [] BeThAn [] [] [] [] [] [] says: yep luv him I LOOK LIKE A GUY--> says: ok just im watching a made up vid in which him and gee are fighting whoes hotter[] [] [] [] [] BeThAn [] [] [] [] [] [] says: frank[] [] [] [] [] BeThAn [] [] [] [] [] [] says: hmmm maybe both of them = )I LOOK LIKE A GUY--> says: GEE[] [] [] [] [] BeThAn [] [] [] [] [] [] says: FRANK ROX MY WORLDI LOOK LIKE A GUY--> says: GERARD ROX MY STRIPY SOX[] [] [] [] [] BeThAn [] [] [] [] [] [] says: FRANK ROX MY SPOTTY SOXI LOOK LIKE A GUY--> says: GERARD ROX MY STRIPY PANTS[] [] [] [] [] BeThAn [] [] [] [] [] [] says: HMMMMM[] [] [] [] [] BeThAn [] [] [] [] [] [] says: FRANK ROX MY WORLD MY SOX MY PANT AND MY BARE FEETI LOOK LIKE A GUY--> says: GERARD ROX MY WORLD WHOLE WARDROBE AND BODY AND BED AND CHAIR[] [] [] [] [] BeThAn [] [] [] [] [] [] says: FRANK ROX MY WORLD MY ROOM MY BODY MY BED DESK CHAIR COMPUTER AND MKOST IMPORTANTLY MY ALMIGHTY SOX THIS IS THE POINT WHERE U BEND DOWN AND WORSHIP FRANK ..AND ME[] [] [] [] [] BeThAn [] [] [] [] [] [] says: lolzI LOOK LIKE A GUY--> says: GERARD ROX MY WORLD WORDROBE UNDERWEAR DRAWER MY MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE BAG MY VANS MY NECKLSCE MY DESK MY CAHIR MY SOFA MY TOWEL MY PHINE AND MY WIRELESS MOUSE*NOW BEND DOWN AND WORSHIP GEE-SUS[] [] [] [] [] BeThAn [] [] [] [] [] [] says: frank rox everything i my room on me everything he touches my garden my dog my cosin my towel my hair my touch typing fingers my eyes my lips my tv my radio my ipod all the pictures of him my vans my converse my skeleton crew top my phone my bebo the skinz my sox my car insursace the add on tv that im watching my sunglasses aquafreash toothpaste my passport and this is the point where u worship[] [] [] [] [] BeThAn [] [] [] [] [] [] says: FRANK IN STEIN I LOOK LIKE A GUY--> says: GERARD ROX MY CORDLESS PHONE MY LAMP MY SCANNER MY LAPTOP MY MAP MY PHOTO OF ME ALLL THE PICTURES OF ME HIM AND BILL MY MINI MULLET MY SWEATER MY HAT MY ITHER HAT MY BADGES MY TV MY MIKEY GLASSES MY BOOK MY CLOCK ALL THE BOOKS IN MY WARDROBE(ABOUT 200) MY MCR TOPS MY PUMPS MY PERCING MY SOON TO BE PERCING MY TOOTHBRUSH MY TABLETS MY SPOON MY PRINTER MY BIN MY ORNAMENT MY SISTERS MY SISSORS MY PLUGI LOOK LIKE A GUY--> says: THAT I DONT KNOW WHATS FORI LOOK LIKE A GUY--> says: N OW BOW DOWN AND WORSHIP THE LORD GERARD ARTHUR WAY[] [] [] [] [] BeThAn [] [] [] [] [] [] says: frank roxs gee bob ray and mikey his roxs pansy(rip)frank roxs every thing he toches frank roxs jamia frank roxs me frank roxs every guitar he touches frank roxs new jersey frank roxs ferard frank roxs mcr frank roxs my room all of my belongs my toohbrush Frank roxs his personal hygine frank roxs his music frank roxs himself frank roxs my knee elbow fingernails frank roxsmy mcr tops,merchandis [] [] [] [] [] BeThAn [] [] [] [] [] [] says: my pencilcase (barbie) frankie roxs my world and my world only! [] [] [] [] [] BeThAn [] [] [] [] [] [] says: now u bend down and worship my frankie!=) [] [] [] [] [] BeThAn [] [] [] [] [] [] says: frankie roxs All I Want For Christmas Is You Lyrics Astro Zombies Lyrics Black Parade Lyrics Blood Lyrics Bury Me In Black Lyrics Cancer Lyrics Cemetery Drive Lyrics Cubicles Lyrics Dead! Lyrics Demolition Lovers Lyrics Desert Song Lyrics Disenchanted Lyrics Disenchanted (Shut Up And Play) Lyrics Drowning Lessons Lyrics Early Sunsets Over Monroeville Lyrics Famous Last Words Ghost of You [] [] [] [] [] BeThAn [] [] [] [] [] [] says: Give 'Em Hell, Kid LyricsHang 'Em High Lyrics Head First For Halos Lyrics Headfirst For Halos Lyrics Heaven Lyrics Heaven Help Us Lyrics Helena Lyrics Hidden Track Lyrics Honey, This Mirror Isn't Big Enough For The Two Of Us Lyrics House Of Wolves Lyrics I'm Not Okay (I Promise) Lyrics I Don't Love You Lyrics I Never Told You What I Do for a Living Lyrics Interlude Lyrics [] [] [] [] [] BeThAn [] [] [] [] [] [] says: Interlude Lyrics It's Not a Fashion Statement, It's a Fucking Deathwish Lyrics Jack The Ripper Lyrics Jetset Life Is Gonna Kill You Lyrics Kill All Your Friends Lyrics Kill All Your Friends! Lyrics Mama Lyrics My Way Home Is Through You Lyrics Our Lady Of Sorrows Lyrics Romance Lyrics Shut Up And Play Lyrics Shut Up And Pray Lyrics Silly Mummy Lyrics Sister To Sleep Lyrics Skylines And Turnstiles I LOOK LIKE A GUY--> says: OK UM I WENT TO GET COFFE[] [] [] [] [] BeThAn [] [] [] [] [] [] says: Sleep Lyrics Song 2 Lyrics Teenagers Lyrics Th Sharpest Lives Lyrics Thank You for the Venom Lyrics The End Lyrics The Ghost Of You Lyrics The Jetset Life Is Gonna Kill You Lyrics The Sharpest Lives Lyrics This Is How I Disappear Lyrics This Is How I Dissapear Lyrics This Is The Best Day Ever Lyrics To the End Lyrics Under Pressure Lyrics Vampires Will Never Hurt You Lyrics I LOOK LIKE A GUY--> says: bethan[] [] [] [] [] BeThAn [] [] [] [] [] [] says: Welcome To The Black Parade Lyrics Welcome to the Black Parade (Radio Edit) Lyrics You Know What They Do to Guys Like Us in Prison Lyrics [] [] [] [] [] BeThAn [] [] [] [] [] [] says: ohh yesh i win!! I LOOK LIKE A GUY--> says: BETHAN[] [] [] [] [] BeThAn [] [] [] [] [] [] says: yaaaI LOOK LIKE A GUY--> says: YOU TOOK SO LONG I'VE DONE MY TEETH FACE CREAM COFFE AND GOT MY HAIR STRAGHNIERS [] [] [] [] [] BeThAn [] [] [] [] [] [] says: yehh buh i still win! =) my fingers r soreI LOOK LIKE A GUY--> says: OK YOU CAN WIN NOW SEEING AS YOU WENT ON A WEBSITE AND COPY AND PASTED ALL THIER SONG NAMES [] [] [] [] [] BeThAn [] [] [] [] [] [] says: OMG!!!!!!!! UR A MIND READER[] [] [] [] [] BeThAn [] [] [] [] [] [] says: I DID THAT CAUSE I KNEW HAT MY FINGERS WERE GONNA BE SORE =)I LOOK LIKE A GUY--> says: i guessed seeing as you knew Silly Mummy[] [] [] [] [] BeThAn [] [] [] [] [] [] says: HEHE
Posted on 08/29/2007 3:29 AM Comments (4)
August 27, 2007I'm not o-f**king-kay part 4Ok thank goodness no other part of my dream came true. Both of Bethans friends were guys. Aiden (her boyfriend) and Storm (I'm working on finding out his real name). So basically now we are at the concert. 4th row whoop whoop*insert mini dance*. Taking back Sunday are just wrapping up. Adam was making a final speech: "Ok I would like to thank you for being here today next up is our bestest friends. My Chemical Romance. And I've been hearing this word used a lot it's umm... Frerard *cue screams* Oh so you know what it is. Well FYI what happens on stage is the tip-top of the ice burg"*cue louder screams* "thank you and good afternoon" The band then exited the stage. "Ok for Frank and Gees sake I hope he was kidding." Storm said. I was surprised. Not many people care about frank and gees feelings in the whole Frerard debate. "I know they get tons of stick about it." I said. "Cool a fellow supporter." "Ditto" I just saw Bethan raise her eyebrow. I wasn't even gonna ask. Suddenly the stage lights dimmed and flames were shot out. Me and Bethan screamed at the top of our lungs. Rendell, Storm and Damien just stood there silent. The band came on stage. I wish I was closer, but I could still see Bob so I was happy. "GOOD DAY "I CAN'T HEAR YOU!!" Everyone shouted even louder. "OK LETS DO THIS 1.2.3.4…" The band launched into This Is How I Disappear. We all started dancing and may I say my version of dancing is nearly pole-dance like. I probably creped out Bethan, Storm and Aiden. Damien is used to my dancing. As the songs progressed I got less and less energetic. "Want to go to the front?" Storm asked me out of nowhere. "Do you need to ask?" "Then take my hand and don't let go till we are there." I clamped my hand in his and followed him as he pushed through the crowd. Some people gave me dirty looks but soon returned to dancing. When we got to the front I was in shock, I was at the front. Gerard's sweat could drop on me if I was any closer. I did all I could not to let my jaw drop. After about 10 seconds I realised I was still holding Storms hand. "Oh umm sorry." I said slipping it out. Either it just got 10 degrees hotter or I was blushing. Shit I hope he can't notice. Of course he can't I'll be bright red anyway from the dancing. I just forgot about it and danced again. I started mucking about dancing up against Storm and he started laughing. Then You Know What They Do To Guys Like Us In Prison started. "Ah your time to shine." I said tuning to Storm "What do you mean?" His face genuinely puzzled "OK I WANT ALL THE BOYS TO TAKE THEIR MOTHER-FUCKING SHIRT OFF. DON'T BE SHY. NO ONE CARES. NOW SWING THEM AROUND IN THE AIR!" Gerard shouted into the mic. I just looked at Storm. "Oh no. I don't want to ruin a good friendship." "20 dollars and a hug if you do." His shirt came off quicker than a blink. And I'm gonna sound like a plastic but he is HOT. I tried not to stare, and most likely failed, and started dancing again. And then Storm put his arm around me and pulled me closer so I was dancing against him again. "WOW SOME OF YOU BOYS AREN'T HALF BAD!! AND YOU'RE REALLY ENTHUSIASTIC AREN'T YOU!! ESPECIALLY THE GUY AT THE FRONT WITH HIS GIRLFRIEND! HE'S REALLY GOING FOR IT!!! COME ON YOU CAN DO BETTER!!" Gerard said pointing to me and Storm. I looked shocked. After mcr had finished I decided to go get a drink, as I'm not the biggest fan of "That one looks like a…umm… could". Came a voice from behind me. I near jumped out of my skin. I turned round to see… "I think your right." I said laughing. "You’re the girl who was dancing in the front row that I pointed out aren't you?" he asked sitting next to me. I pinched myself again. I love reality. "yeah. Though technically you pointed out Storm." "Well he seriously was the most into it. Where is your boyfriend?" "I think he's still in the crowd and Storm isn't my boyfriend." "Your wasting a huge chance there." He half singed "Wait am I back in 3rd grade? Whoa" We both started laughing "What do you mean anyway?" "I saw you guys and Storm is totally into you. Every time I looked at you he hadn't taken your eyes off you." "Seriously? Whoa Thanks for telling me. I would have never known." "Well I'm glad I could help. I wish I could get that. You probably know that I thought I did." "I heard. I'm sorry it didn't work." "Well I am sure I'll find someone who will stay forever. Hopefully before I'm 60" "Your "It's 3 metres actually." "This is gonna sound really fan-girly but can I get a picture with you." "Yeah of course." He said smiling I took the picture, lucky I set my camera to muti-burst so I have like 5 pictures and after getting his autograph I headed back to the car. *in the car* "So Storm where do you live?" Damien asked after leaving Aiden and Bethan at Aiden's house. "Chestnut estate" "Wait I live there too." I half-gasped, my jaw dropping. "How have we not meet before?" "I have no clue" "Well I'll just drop you off at Bells house it's less hassle. Is that ok Storm?" "Yeah fine." We drove for another 5 minutes while I continued talking about how cool Gerard was. "Ok now stop bragging and get out of my car before I say your full name." Damien said stopping outside my house. "You would dare." "Wouldn't I Isa..." "COME ON STORM LETS GET OUT!" I interrupted jumping out of the car. Damien just laughed as he drove off. "I just remembered something." Storm said walking next to me. "What's that?" "You owe me a "Darn my purse is inside and you know what we must be on a roll cause I just remembered something. "Shit I hate those rock star types always giving away secrets." "So it's true?" "Well I did look away…When I was taking off my shirt I couldn't see you" He just looked like he wanted to die right there. "Well I think it's sweet and I think that you deserve this." I said leaning up to his cheek giving him a kiss. I stepped back down and looked at him. "Who am I kidding?" I wrapped my arms round his neck and kissed him full on. He kissed back and just melted into my arms. "Can I just say I have never done this before so you better feel special" said breaking the kiss and smiling. "I felt special when I meet you" "Ok just for that you are coming in so continue that kiss and it is not because I'm cold." I said half-laughing, fumbling with my keys I guided him into the living room. Everyone was out but it was still a mess. I sat down on the sofa grinning. We continued kissing for another 5 minutes till I heard the front door open. "Libby! Where are you?" I heard Jenny calling. "In the living room." I jumped up trying not to make it obvious what I'd just done by straightening my clothes and hair. Typical she's the ONLY one who calls me Libby. "My friends coming over could you…Who's that?" She said looking up from the magazine she had in her hand. "This is Storm and no I will not make dinner you can just order in food or make your own." I replied sitting back down on the sofa, Storm secretly tickled my back. I nearly giggled but kept a straight face "Could you lend me some money then?" "NO now I am going up to my room, I need to get something" I pulled Storm up, giving a shocked jenny a ha-ha you have to cope on your own look. Now I know why I was meant to clean my room. I just skipped over piles of clothes and lay on my bed staring at the ceiling "So Libby where does "I'll tell you if you tell me your name" I teased "We having been making out for the last ten minutes and you don't tell me your real name. Fine that’s the last time then." "Ok…It's Rendell" "It’s better than mine. Libby-Isabelle Zoë Welby." "Zoë agh that rocks." "Oh but the rest doesn't" "Yes I does. My little pretty Izzy" he said putting his arms around me "Call me Izzy again and I'll never talk to you." "Sorry. Here let me make it up to you." He said kissing me and moving down my neck. God I need to check his room for a copy of how to make girls fall in love with you. "Strom wait wait wait. I need to tell you something before we get too far." I said pulling away sitting up. "You sound serious." "Well it is…"
Posted on 08/27/2007 2:13 AM Comments (2)
August 23, 2007my drugsI've wrote something about this on msn ans ppl have asked wtf its abouts so here it is. ok first things first they are medicine.Or illegal. My drugs are people. Some my friends others are musicians. 3 of my friends have given up today. They all know who they are even if some of them don't have buzznet I'll show them this 1 day. If thier still here. ok Suki(all names are changed) discovered a band when she was in a different country. I discovered them a few months ago, but i didn't listen to them often...Tokio Hotel. Suki has got obsessed and even carved the guitarest names on her arm with i don't know what. Earlier i mentioned a dream i had about them and she didn't see the dream part of the story and thought it was real and got excited cause she thought she was going to meet them and now is refusing to talk to me saying i lied. before she got into music she was the most hyper person in the universe. Now she hasn't stopped crying since sunday. Kim is depressed because of a guy too but thats because she's reliased he'll never go out with a non-celebrity. She was the one who gave Suki the carving idea. Though I'm usdsed to her being depressed she has been for a while on and off. The last friend i don't want to talk about, It is stressing me so much i'm thinking of going back to my old way of dealing with stress. only Suki and Beecca and Katie know what that way is. And I've only stopped that why for a month, but i thought it was gone for good. Now i think i might start again. Only 1 persons stopping me from giving up too. And EVERYONE knows who that is.Even now thier making giggle at joke about bill and dreams.
Posted on 08/23/2007 2:26 PM Comments (0)
August 14, 2007Just something i need to sayI'm feeling REALLY shitty atm. There's a thing about REAL mcr fans and how ppl who just joined the mcrmy in '06 were just because they came cool. I didn’t know about them till '06, except for Becca and Katie mentioning them just before the album. Yeah I didn't even purchase one of their songs till December, just after xmas when I got my i-pod and YES I only purchased them cause my little sister liked them and I was gonna share my pod but one night I listened to I'm not okay and I heard the line I'm not o-fucking-Kay and I was shocked(and strangely happy) that there was a swear cause the music I listened to before went as far as flip and nowhere further. This is seriously the order of what my music life was I am ashamed to write it Spice girls Steps All saints Busted Hilary duff Mcfly S club juniors/8 Back to Mcfly Lil' Chris (I was still into him when I joined buzznet) MCR But it's really getting me stressed that some ppl she all of the fans that popped p after tbp as ppl who just jumped on the bandwagon. So basically yes I didn't love them from bullets, but I wish I had it would have made me feel whole before.
Me just before mcr the other day At a linedancing party | | | | / /
Posted on 08/14/2007 9:05 AM Comments (1)
August 10, 2007I'm not o-f**king-kay part 3"Ok so you're sure that you'll be ok." I asked Ryan for the billionth time that morning "Yes now go you NEVER get out apart from going round to Daimiens house." Wow even the twerp noticed I had no social life. It was 8am. Me, Damien, Bethan and her 2 friends are taking the day off school. Agh the gigs in just under 5 hours. I feel so bad leaving them alone. NO! I'm not going to let them come between me and a good time. I deserve these tickets. So why do I still feel bad. I went and got in Daimiens car. We decided to take his car instead because mine doesn't make a great impression. "So where does our saviour live?" Damien asked. Laughing slightly. "BETHAN lives in We hardly talked the rest of the drive, which is really weird because people can rarely shut us up. "Ah so you can speak just your awfully quiet." "No I'm just thinking. Before we go to the arena I need to go see a friend. I'll be 5 minutes max; it's just to sort out some business." "What sort of business?" "I'm sorry We don't have any secrets I thought but I didn't dare say it aloud in case he got mad again. We went roundto Bethans, her two friends were with her. There was a girl around 14/5 she had purple short hair, was wearing a pink linkin park tee, a white and blue checked hoody and jeans. The other, a guy, was about 17 he had long-ish scruffy, brown hair. He was wearing a black tee with a skull on, a DEAD! Hoody and HIM jeans. He wasn't half bad looking. "Ok, guys this is "Savage? Cool name." "Well it's really Sophie but I made up a scene name and eventually shortened it." "Ok well guys, like I told He marched quickly into a block of flats. As soon as he was out of sight I turned round to talk to everyone. "So, Sam, what school do you go to cause I haven't seen you at ours?" "I'm a senior at the grammar high. Me and Savage both go we're brother and sister." After that we just talked about music and stuff, till my cell went off. "Hello?" "Bell It's Damien, quick come to flat 13 I need you. NOW!!" He's sounded really scared. "DAMIEN!! WHERE ARE YOU?" I shouted looking about the flat. (Which was huge FYI) "I'm in the bedroom" His voice sounded weak. I ran in. Damien was on the floor. Both his eyes were black he had cut all over his face and...And a wound in his side. There was A LOT of blood pouring out. "I didn't have enough money." "Enough money for what?" I pulled my cell out again and dialled 911 " "Damien we have NO secrets" I wanted to hear his answer but the operator picked up "Hello ambulance please. Yeah my friends been stabbed. Um flat 13 in the jetter block. Ok hurry" "Ok Damien now tell me WHAT??" "Heroin." "WHAT?!?!?! How could you do something like that??" I was practically screaming. Damien was smart he would never do that junk. "It was to help me with finals my head was messed up and a guy offered me methadone and when it stopped working I moved to heroin." I could hear the sirens already. "You were busy with your family and Dwayne moving and the depression." "Don't dare use that against me you know it was bad then but I still went on didn't i?" I spat it at him. How dare he. He was my best friend. The ambulance people came in and took him off me. "Do you want to come in the ambulance with him?" the woman asked. "No, I'll drive the car up. Damien where are the keys?" Now that I'd calmed down I realised how serious it was. He couldn't even speak now he just pointed to his pocket. I pulled them out and headed to the car. Everyone was gathered outside to see who the ambulance was for. I just walked past Bethan, Sam and Savage and they just followed me to the car without a word. *at the hospital* I sat in the hall at the hospital; we'd been there for hours, I told them to go home, he wasn't their close friend but Sam insisted on staying. Everyone was standing in the arena watching the gig and I was waiting for my secretly junkie friend to come round. Sam came a sat next to me handing me a hot chocolate "Thanks" I whispered. I could feel tears stinging my eyes. "He'll be okay "Miss Welby, we need your help with something." Said one of the doctors. "Umm…ok. What do you need to know?" "Was Damien on any drugs? Prescription or other. His medical history hasn't came trough." "Umm… yeah I just found out today. He's on heroin." "Ok do you know when he last took it?" "Ok well his tox-screen will be back soon, I just wanted to see just so we could act sooner." "Oh right ok. Is it ok if I stand outside the window?" "Yeah I see no reason why not." He walked away. "Sam will you come with me?" I asked turning around to face him "Of course." He said standing. We walked to the resuscitation room. I looked in the window. There were doctors crowded around Damien checking different machines. Sam gripped my hand as if to say it's scarier than it looked. We continued watching for 20 minutes. All the doctors left eventually. Just a nurse remained. Suddenly she looked worried and I realised why. The sound of his machine had stopped. He was arresting. I nearly collapsed. Doctors rushed back in. they started CPR and shocking him. Tears flowed down my face and I didn't even bother to hide them or wipe them away. It just repeated in front of me, like a bad part of a movie you hate but can't stop watching. Eventually they stoped, but something hit me. The machine hadn't started again. They had switched it off. I dropped to the floor and started sobbing even more. Then I heard Damien's voice speak to me. " I opened them. I was in my room. I was in my bed. It was all a dream. Oh thank god. Damien was next to me. "Damien thank god." "What happened? I came round to see you before the concert, Ryan let me in and told me you were taking a nap I came in and you were talking in your sleep." "I had a nightmare. You were on drugs and got stabbed and you were in hospital and died. And…and" I just fell in his arms crying. "What drugs was I on?" he asked looking…worried? "Heroin." His face dropped "Oh Damien your not." "That’s what I wanted to tell you on Saturday." "Yeah well you better stop before my dream comes true." "I will, Now are we going to see this gig or not" "Ok lets go."
Posted on 08/10/2007 2:17 PM Comments (2)
August 8, 2007New jersy facts
Posted on 08/08/2007 12:04 PM Comments (0)
ok i'm doing this but no one HAS took this is basically the tagged thing.
1) I only 10 friends on my phone. 2) I lost my eyliner in the cinema 3) every time i curled my hair last year i wore the same top 4) I'm allergy to most clothes detergents 5)The only soap i watch is nieghbour 6) I once tricked a woman to give me a chritan dior bag for £1( she didn't know it was designer) 7) I am on chapther 25 of harry potter 8) I have been in a music video
Posted on 08/08/2007 9:26 AM Comments (1)
August 5, 2007I'm not o-f**king-kay chapther 2*in maths* ".. And so that is how you find the length of the opposite. Any question?" My math teacher Miss Cream. Yeah can you repeat that again cause I didn't ear any of it cause it's almost 1:55 and Casey gets out of school in 5 minutes and I was wondering if my mum would pick her up, I thought to myself. Lucky I have a library period next so that if no one turned up I would be able to get her. The bell rang and I sprinted out the door so I could get the seat at the back of the library where the teachers never heard cell phones. "Ah Libby-Isabelle. I've been looking for you." Said I voice behind me. I knew whenever my full name is used I'm either in trouble or have to do something terrible. "Mr Zeta, Is something wrong?" I asked putting on a smile. "Umm... Sorta… You know your top of your biology class…" he said looking awkward. "Yeah I've been told." A zillion times I added in my head "Well there's a freshman class and they…" "Don't understand anything." "Yeah." God he must be desperate "Ok so when do you want me to start?" "Right now." He had this really hopeful look on his face. Agh I hate being a soft touch. "Ok not like there's anything that I NEED to do." I hope. I walked to room 345. "Ok so leaves are green because they contain chlorophyll, a pigment that plays an important role in photosynthesis. Any questions?" A guy at the back of the room raised his hand. All his friends were laughing. $20 it's a question totally about leaves. "Yes?" "Your that girl who drives the mini van aren't you?" I'm gonna kill him "Yes I drive a mini van for personally reasons but that is off the topic." Before I even got the sentence out they were all rioting and shouting stuff at me. "RIGHT THAT’S IT IF YOU DON'T ALL SHUT UP I HAVE THE POWER TO REFER YOU ALL FOR DETENTION!!!!" I shouted above them all. I don't but it shut them up. "Thank you." I said my voice little more than a whisper. I carried on teaching and surprising no one made another remark or major false move. When the lesson ended I opened my bag and checked my phone. No missed calls. Ok that means Casey was safe, "Excuse me." I looked up to see one of the students. She had dark blonde hair and was wearing a customised hoody with band names all over. "Is something wrong? Just most people were dying to leave." "No I was just wondering. I sorta won tickets to pro rev for Thursday night and I saw you around school and I thought you looked cool and I wanted to know if you wanted 1 of the tickets and a extra 1 because I got 5 and I only have 2 friends that can make it and like the bands." "Are you serious?" I said trying not to squeal. "Yeah." I pinched myself. Nope not a dream. "Ok...Um thanks. I don't even know your name." "Ok Bethan. Here's my cell number. Call me later. I need to talk to my friend so don't give away the extra ticket." *at home on my laptop* I was sitting finishing off an English essay when Damien signed on. I didn't see him after the whole ticket extravaganza so I better tell him now. Most bells ring I rock (you can guess who's that is): hey Jimmy I am Jim fish fingers: Hey Bella Most bells ring I rock: What have I said about calling me Bella? I am Jim fish fingers: I know but you called me jimmy Most bells ring I rock: Okay point taking any ways I got brilliant news I am Jim fish fingers: oh your dad appeared and gave you $1000000 and you bought a new house for me Most bells ring I rock: no such luck yet. Lol no I got tickets for pro rev I am Jim fish fingers: Stop kidding me Libby-Izzy Most bells ring I rock: Call me Libby-Izzy and you aren't coming I am Jim fish fingers: Whoa you're serious. How'd you manage that? Most bells ring I rock: Some Freshman girl gave them to me she said I seemed cool and had 2 spare tickets I am Jim fish fingers: okkkkk and your sure it’s legit? Most bells ring I rock: Yeah she seemed serious I am Jim fish fingers: OK well when you seeing her next? Most bells ring I rock: I don't know she's calling later I am Jim fish fingers: Ok well when she does make sure you get mine Most bells ring I rock: ok I will. G2G Casey needs me
Posted on 08/05/2007 12:48 PM Comments (4)
August 2, 2007I'm not o-fucking-kay*Meep meep meep*
Agh I hate mornings. I moved my arm out from under my crumpled duvet and groped around for my alarm clock. I don't need it to wake me up I need it to tell me when to stop trying to go to sleep. I can't remember the last time I slept for more that 2 hours. I rolled off my bed and landed on my butt on the floor with my duvet over my head. Another day, another 6 and half hours of school. I stood up, nearly smashing a cup laying on my floor in the process. Walking across the hall I pushed against the bathroom door but it didn't open. "RYAN GET OUT OF THE BATHROOM NOW OR I'M NOT GIVING YOU A LIFT TODAY!!" I shouted pounding on the door. Ow that hurt. "Ok 1 minute let me get decent." He said. How can he be so laid back? Well I suppose it's cause he's not the one who everyone picks on, he's not the one whose "friends" only talks to them when they have a problem with studying. AND HE'S NOT THE ONE WHO HAS TO KEEP ALL THE SECRETS OF THE WORLD IN THEIR HEAD. After he FINALLY got out and I got a shower and dried and straightened my hair I searched my floor for my top. I really need to clean my room. I believe I was asked 3...4 years ago, ah I'll do it later. After giving up the search I just grabbed the closest top, a pair of jeans and a pair of black slip on shoes with stars on and ran down stairs for breakfast. "Oh my god, what have you been doing in here?" I said looking around the kitchen. There was cereal all over the floor, milk on the counter and magazines and newspapers everywhere. "I was trying to make breakfast for mummy, but I'm too short to see the bowl." Said my little sister Casey. Aww shes only 6 and never stops trying to help. "Its ok Casey thats really nice of you." I said picking her up and hugging her Ok I'll quickly explain my family. I'm the second eldest of 5 and I pay for it everyday. My older brother Dwayne is 18, he moved out 3 months ago. My eldest little sister Jenny is 13 and somehow can get up 20 minutes before she leaves for school and still has not a hair out of place. Casey is the worrier, she worrys about mum, school, money and me sometimes. And who can forget Ryan the most annoying guy in the world. 15, popular, has 2 or 3 girlfriends at a time and is NEVER in trouble. My mum is out most nights drinking and picking up men and crying when they leave her. Oh and me. I'm the one who has to pick up the pieces. When I passed my driving test I couldn't get the 5 seat car that I wanted. I got a 7 seated mini van so I could do the school run and was able so that if anyone wanted a friend over i could be there. My name is Libby-Isabelle, but everyone has been begged to call me Bell. I'm 16 and the only time I've every been happy is when I went to stay at my aunts for a week, though the whole time i was there I was worrying about every one. I grabbed a brush and a cloth and cleaned up the kitchen before I made my breakfast. My phone started to vibrate. Please be a friend texting me to say that they have a rich uncle who'll marry my mum. Nope, just the tablet reminder. Darn I always forget that I set this. I walked over to the cupboard and pulled out 4 different bottles of pills. "Jenny pill time." I shouted up the stairs. She dragged herself down the stairs her perfect blonde hair for 1 minute not perfect. I open the vitamin bottle and handed one to Casey, an Eye-q tablet (which is basically fish oil) to Jenny and Ryan, I took my anti-biotic and poured mums tablets out, filled up a glass of water and brought them up to her. When I got to her door I hesitated, I listened carefully to her door. Shed went out last night so you never knew what to expect. I heard her snoring softly so I guess it was ok. "Mum heres your tablet. I want you to take it cause you know if you dont then you wont be healthy, the doctor told you that." I explained placing the glass and tablet on her bed side table. She just opened her eyes and turned over. *20 minutes later* "Ok last call for lifts to school." I said poking head in to the living room. I already had Casey resting on my hip. For a 6 year-old she light. As I walked out Ryan and Jenny ran past me to get to the van first. They argue over the front seat ever morning. "You know the rules. Its Ryans turn. Jenny you get tomorrow."I said placing Casey in her booster seat. "Oh and Jenny you know if you get seen in that skirt your in detention." I said pointing to her short pink skirt "So what maybe I want detention." she replied giving me a look which Im guessing was supposed to mean Duh. "Ryan whos her boyfriend this week." Her mouth dropped. "I believe Johnny Kerr." He said in a very smart sounding voice. "Hes NOT my boyfriend! Now can we get to school?" "Whatever." *at school* Ah California state high. Home to all the kids who couldnt pay for the grammar high. "Aww look its the 16 year old mum to 4." Shouted one of the jock from across the car park. "Why dont you shut the heck up? At least the kids youre talking about is my mum and siblings and not off a bunch of randomers that I picked up in a bar and screwed. How many do you have now?" I didnt even stick around for the aftermath. As I was sorting through my books in my locker someone put their hands on my shoulders and jumped. "WHA!" I turned round to see my friend Damien "You do know you would get a better reaction if you didnt do that EVERY morning." I told him while taking out my biology text book. "Its my special way of saying hello to you." Me and Damien were partnered up in junior high for a project and we've been inseparable since. He is literally my ONLY full-time friend in school. "So what you doing this weekend?" Damien asked "Oh I have a date with Oli Skyes and then dinner with Gerard Way." "Oh quiet weekend." "Ok so what do you want to do?" "Well I need to talk to you about something. Its not important but I thought we could get a DVD, some ice-cream and chat." "Ok sounds like a plan." Then we headed to home room *Damiens pov*
Bell rocks so much. She is my bestest friend in the world. She understsnds EVERYTHING that I talk about no matter if she's never heard of it before. Her ONLY fault is that she keeps putting herself down about her hair, her weight, her life and most of all her condition...
Posted on 08/02/2007 1:41 PM Comments (3)
Random poem i wrote ages agoYou see me walk the corridor everyday You have discriminated me in every way You’ve called me all the names under the sun You’ve used me as a pun I have feelings too So why should I be like you? And yet we have never talked And yet I feel stalked Because every time I turn around I bet you five pound You’ll be there But why should I care So why do I care If you always stare I don’t do you any harm Why should I be part of you stereotypical farm But then I look again And it’s as obvious as Big Ben You’re as mean as it can get But I won’t fret You can laugh and stare But I won’t care I’ll still be who I want to be I’m free Your part of a flock There are a thousand clones of you in stock So next time think twice Before you have to pay the price I am unique Even if I look like a geek
Posted on 08/02/2007 12:00 PM Comments (0)
|
ARCHIVE
MY FRIENDS
midnightnightmaresxx
awitheredpastandablurryfuture fairyxwithxfangs Happy as Annie kidsinglasshouses farfora matthewlush foreverthesickestkids envyonthecoast divaxatlanta aliciasimmons Tokio Hotel FOLLOWERS ALL FRIENDS |
Buzz Feed